Friday, May 14, 2010

Lost


I have a tendency to get "lost"--as my husband calls it.  I find it often happens after meal times.  Here's the scenario: I work hard coordinating everything that goes into preparing a meal for my family.  We eat.  And then I wander over to check my email or work on a planning page or chart on my computer, and an hour later, I wonder how I could have spent so much time there.

Does this happen to anyone else?

In analyzing this phenomenon, I notice that after a meal, the kids are usually content to play on their own for a good, long stretch, which leaves me free.  But I rarely use this time for something on my To Do list.  Instead, it's blogging, "checking" (ie., my email--my eldest's term for it), surfing, finding a cute picture with which to illustrate a page and making it work just so (that could encompass a post unto itself).

I know that I tend to have a lot of inertia (and I wonder where my first-born gets it...).  What I'm doing, I want to keep doing for a long time, and I don't want to think about where I need to be next.  Staying on schedule takes a lot of mental energy for me.  I'm a task-oriented person, rather than time-oriented, and getting a bunch of things done in one day requires a bit of both.

I've been experimenting with a new homemaking routine (somewhat based on this), which I'd like to post about in-depth at some point, but I am finding that, mainly, I can still get only one thing accomplished in a day (in addition to all the childcare activities and cooking that I do), be it homeschooling, cleaning a zone of the house, or walking to the library.  After that, I get lost. 

Do I just need the time to recharge my "schedule batteries" with some unstructured "play" time like my kids do?  Is this something I should build into my day or something I should try to curb?  I am currently undecided, but I know that pretending that I won't continue to do this is not an option.

8 comments:

  1. Sad to say, I'm commenting on this right after dinner while everything needs to be cleaned up behind me.

    Ugh.

    I think the main reasons I'm working on an organizational system are:

    1. Things must get done. If I wander around, I'll forget to do something. And I'm a listmaker.

    2. I have a tendency to become overwhelmed looking at the whole. If I can see a short, finite list, I'm more likely to start and finish.

    3. When the pendulum swings, I tend to deny myself any rest/relaxation/hobby at all because "the laundry is waiting", etc. If I have finished everything on my list for the day, the tornado that hit the boys' room earlier in the day is ok to wait until tomorrow.

    I'm enjoying your blog! I'm going to spend some time looking back through it.

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  2. Physical energy influences. Keeping this short so I get on to my day!

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  3. Yes, Matushka Anna, you know EXACTLY what I mean by getting "lost." :)

    I agree with both #1 and #2. And I like the sound of #3. I need to know when to stop and not feel anxious that I should be doing something else. And maybe this would help me with getting "lost." Maybe I wouldn't feel the need to steal minutes from my day or become tired and escape into my computer if there were an end in sight?

    I've been enjoying your blog as well!

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  4. The funny thing is #3 is the deal maker/breaker for me. This is usually what happens:

    1. Things gradually disentigrate.
    2. I finally get moving.
    3. I work without stopping until past midnight.
    4. The next day I try to keep the momentum and start to falter.
    5. I get resentful when I realize that there will ALWAYS be something else to do and I will NEVER get a break.
    6. I give up in disgust and go read/blog/whatever, still feeling guilty so not enjoying it.
    7. Rinse, lather, repeat at 2 week intervals.

    Not a good system. That's what I'm trying to change.

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  5. The book "The Now Habit" is helping me figure out how to juggle my day job, farming, parenting, and everything else productively and without guilt. Still a long road for sure, but it's great for helping figure out what to do with unlimited demands like me and moms face.

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  6. Ryan, although I'm unfamiliar with the book, the title reminds me of FlyLady's "Do it now!" principle. Good advice!

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  7. Matushka, I know that process VERY well (although being pregnant, I haven't work until midnight in a while).

    What frustrates me is that I seem to be able to get only one extra thing done a day (in addition to the cooking and childcare). I can homeschool, but not clean. I can clean, but not get to the library. Or I can walk to the library, but not do any of the above. Sigh. THAT's what I'D like to change! Because if I don't, I fall into the cycle you described and finally I just escape it and go online. :)

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  8. Yup, online is my escape too. ;-) Here I am.

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